You know, if only there were a video clip that explains this concept…HIT IT, MATT AND BEN!
Lion Face: He Eats Apples, Red Delicious, And They Must Be Nutritious, Because He Never Misses, He’s Dirkalicious
The old is new is old is new again.
Old Man Nowitzki is an MVP candidate. Mark it. They’re not made in November, but he’s done enough to go ahead and etch his name on the list. 41 and 12 for the big man, and no need for assists, since the possession ended with him. 15 of 29, nabbing 41 with only one three. That’s bezerk, given his range. Moreover, his play down the stretch wasn’t just nailing shots in his wheelhouse. The tip to put them up two at the end of regulation was heady. The and-one drives he nabbed late were just gritty work that you don’t expect from him but he looked confident in nailing. He’s got the electrifying thing going where he touches the ball and the whole building, the concession guys and the announcers hold their breath. Brilliant work, tonight, and he was the reason the Mavs won that game. Catch the Nowitzki Experience, coming to your town soon.
Lemon Face: The Cleveland Cavaliers Basketball Organization
Man, where to start. Mo Williams, reverting back to, um, Mo Williams at 2 of 13 for 6 points? J.J. Hickson plummeting back to earth with 6 points? How about Lebron? Surely his 34 and 9 is enough to warrant him another excuse from lemon face discipline! Not so fast, my leige. How about 6 turnovers, 4 fouls, and getting blocked once? Oh, no, we’re not done. How about complaining about the officiating after getting your ass handed to you? Seriously, did dominating a tired Hawks team in the 2nd round last year just make him think he’s supposed to win all the time, and if he doesn’t he gets to act like John Cusack at a media session? But more than James is this. This was not a rivalry. It wasn’t. The Wizards hated the Cavs and the Cavs ignored the Wizards and that’s hot it was. But somehow, someway, Cleveland has managed to lower itself to Washington’s level, and now, folks? After a creaming like this? It’s a rivalry. And even though the Cavs have owned them historically and have matchup advantages all over, rivalries are a weird thing. And they have a strange way of biting you in the ass when you least expect it. Like, oh, say, tonight.
Lion Face: Antawn Jamison
31, 10, and a win over their rival ain’t a bad way to welcome them back to the game. Now if the Wizards can just, you know, keep this momentum and keep playing like this instead of doing what they did the last time they won a big game (opening night) and wandering around in their own poo. Maybe Jamison really is the heart and soul of that team, and he just needed a role player like Zero around to support him. Maybe that’s the secret of the Wiz. Id (Butler, Ego (Jamison) and Super-Ego (Arenas) all together at last. Enhance. Clickety clickety. Enhance.
Lemon Face: The Toney Douglas Experiment
So much for the youngster coming in and making an impact. Gets the start and rolls out 12 minutes, 4 points, and 2 fouls before being banished once more. I’d blame D’Antoni for not playing him more, but you have to get the feeling the word’s come down that AI is incoming and while they weren’t going to scrap the plan an hour before gametime, Douglas was going to have to woo. No woo.
Lion Face: Al Harrington
Hey, I’m an Al guy, and I know his limitations and problems and all the reasons to hate him. But 26 on 13 shots (!) in 30 minutes is Lion Facey, especially when it results in a rare win for them thar Knickerbockers. He’s only good for about three of those a year, but when he’s good, he’s great, in a, you know, Al Harrington way. <3 U, Al.
Lemon Face: Anyone that elected to watch Philly versus Charlotte.
I’m all for mediocre basketball. I am. There were no winners there. May God have mercy on your soul.
Lion Face: Joe Johnson, I mean, Josh Smith, I mean, Al Horford, I mean, oh, hell. THE ATLANTA HAWKS AGAIN.
You know how you’d see Johnson go Nova, and say “Man, if they could just get someone, anyone else producing for him, they’d be pretty good.”?And then you’d see Smith do something incredible and say “Man, if only he could play consistently with a modicum of intelligence and have some artillery support, they’d be pretty great!”? It’s all coming together. Johnson wasn’t having one of his “pull it out of his backside” nights like against Portland the other night. This was work. Pump faking, range shooting, defender slipping, screen using work. And Smith? Hold on, you might want to sit down. You ready? Josh Smith…
used the low post. I know. I’m not ready for this world either. I don’t care that he was up against Beasley and Shavlik Randolph. It’s the fact that it actually occurred to him. Strike up the banjo, billy ray! We got ourselves a hoedown!
Lemon Face: The Portland 4th Quarter
I don’t know what happened, since I was watching the main game, so I’ll let Blazers fans fill me in. Not paying attention? Just went cold? Lost your damn fool minds? Letting Detroit put up 31 to your 17 and letting them make a game of it is just dangerous. That’s Ben Gordon over there. Watch yourselves. This is a minor lemon face, because you did hold them to 12 points in the third, but still! Finish, people, finish! Step and turn and one and two and JAZZ HANDS! FINISH!
Lion Face: Marc Gasol, AKA the best player on the Grizzlies
Gasol finished with 16, 8, 6 with 1 steal and 2 blocks in the elusive win over the Clippers, which makes this game like the slow hyena that can’t control its vocal chords chasing down the elk that feasts on McDonalds leftovers. Except that would be in Africa, so leftovers are unlikely. Hmm. Fine then, this is like me managing to get through that analogy successfully. Regardless, Gasol only needed 8 shots tonight, and he’s the one Grizzlie player that works the whole game through. Imagine what he’d be lke on a real team with real coaching. Don’t worry though, at least the Grizzlies know what they have with him enough not to draft a center with their #2 pick.
Lemon Face: Indiana
You lost to a team that is excited and hopeful about AI coming in. Time to re-evaluate that hot streak, there, buckos.
