BREAKING: Vince Carter Still Comes Off As A Jerkbag

Vince Carter was shaking his head “no,” before the question was even finished.Returning to the NBA Slam Dunk contest — even in the name of raising funds for charity — at the urging of Shaquille O’Neal was not something he would consider.

“No. Dwight Howard can do it,” Carter said after Wednesday morning’s practice. “Nobody should feel obligated to do anything they don’t want to do.”

via Carter Says No to Shaq’s Dunk Contest Idea — NBA FanHouse.

You know what’s weird? People that know Carter? LOVE the man. LOVE. He’s constantly involved with charitable stuff. He’s talked about as a good teammate.

And man, I still don’t like the guy. If I ever meet him, I’m sure I’ll walk away impressed and then feel bad for all the times I’ve call him a douchebag.

But come ON, Vince!

A simple, “I would, but I’ve had too many injuries and my team and I are struggling too much right now for me to put distractions on us.” would do. Or how about making light of himself:

“Man, do you see how often I get injured? I’m so old I’d end up breaking my hip in a dunk contest, and no one wants to see that.”

How about going for the ol’ “I can’t dunk that well anymore, I’m over 30. If you want to have a layup contest we could do that” ?

But no. He opts for “No one should have to do what they don’t want to do.” Which a completely true statement and I full endorse the idea. But GOOD GOD, you come off as such a whiny little $%^$ when you say that, VC! Nevermind the constant “OH NOES! MAI HAMSTRUNGS HAF TEH PAINZ!” every time you step on the floor, or the dogging it in Toronto, or the swallowing possessions whole for the Magic, who were, you know, good before you showed up. Couldn’t you just handle this in a way that makes you seem like less of a Veruca Salt clone (the character, not the band)?

I’m sure Carter is the nicest guy you’ll ever meet. But the dude he plays on television isn’t really a villain, he’s just the annoying guy on LOST you hope gets eaten by the smoke monster.

Oster-Tags: orlando magic, Vince Carter, vincecarterisadouchebag