“As I told you a little bit earlier in the hour, I have some news to report about your New York Knicks.  The Orlando Magic, I will preface my statement by telling you that they have categorically denied this, but my sources tell me that they have inquired about Tyson Chandler and Amar’e Stoudemire going to Orlando for Dwight Howard.  Let me confess to you that I’m torn.  From a basketball standpoint, it would seem you do that trade in a heartbeat.  You don’t teach seven-feet and you don’t teach the dominate and the skills that Dwight Howard has.  But I like Tyson Chandler.  I like the fact that he rebounds and defends.”

From ESPN reports that Magic have “inquired” about a trade of Amar’e Stoudemire and Tyson Chandler for Dwight Howard via IamaGM.com quoting Stephen A. Smith on 1050 ESPN New York

I have a couple of pertinent thoughts on this report, the overriding theme of each of which is that this trade is just not going to happen.

First, I’m not sure why the Magic would want to take on what is increasingly looking like an uninsured albatross of a contract to Amar’e Stoudemire, nor why they would want to send Dwight Howard to New York to help the Knicks alleviate their roster construction problems. As Yahoo!’s Adrian Wojnarowski wrote over the weekend, the Magic are too good right now to just trade Howard and effectively give up on the season. Even shooting guard J.J. Redick is of the belief that this Magic team is the best one he’s been on since he came to Orlando six years ago, and they went to the Finals in 2009. It doesn’t make sense to break up this team, especially since the Eastern Conference is pretty wide open id Dwyane Wade’s injury lingers and the Miami Heat aren’t at full strength for the playoffs.

Second, and excuse me while I go into full Hubie Brown mode here, but: “You’re Otis Smith. You’re the General Manager of the Orlando Magic, and your previously much-maligned roster has gelled like never before at the beginning of this lockout-condensed season. However, you’re still not entirely convinced that your star center will want to stay in Orlando long term, and you’re also not entirely convinced that this hot start is for real. After all, this is mostly the same team from last year’s run, with Glen ‘Big Baby’ Davis swapped in for Brandon Bass. You know that losing Dwight Howard for nothing will make fans go nuts, and might even cost you your job. You also know that while you’ve engaged in active discussions to trade Howard to the Los Angeles Lakers, they’ve yet to offer both Pau Gasol and Andrew Bynum in the same deal. Now, what do you do?”

The answer to the question I just asked myself in – I think – the fourth person is this, “You leak it to a prominent media member that you’re considering trading Howard to New York for Amar’e Stoudemire and Tyson Chandler to put pressure on a Lakers team that has already missed out on Chris Paul and seem him shipped to the other Los Angeles team, is struggling to create offense and has a fan base that might actually spontaneously combust if Howard was traded to the Knicks.”

And that’s what I think has happened here. Sometimes, knowingly or unknowingly, reporters get used for leverage. I’m not saying that Stephen A. Smith didn’t get this information from a credible source; I have no doubt that he did. After all, his sources have been on point about other unlikely things before – he was talking LeBron and Chris Bosh to Miami before pretty much anyone else, even if Alan Hahn, then of Newsday and now of MSG, officially broke the news – but to me, this smells of Laker-bait, and not much else.

Lastly, other than the team not being good, this is the most annoying part about liking the Knicks. They’re seemingly linked to every big time player who is mentioned in trade rumors, and there’s endless pining for players who aren’t on the team and likely never will be. That type of madness seriously needs to stop. Like, NOW.

Source: Caron Butler agrees to terms with Clippers. Three years, 24M.

December 8, 2011 8:32 am via Mobile WebReplyRetweetFavorite

@daldridgetnt

David Aldridge

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Oh, man.

Where do we begin, here?

Do we make fun of the Clippers for bringing in a 31 year old even though the ages of their key players are just a few years removed from starting with a 1? Or how about we make fun of the Clippers for that 31 year old is coming off major surgery? Or how he’s a terrible fit for the Clips because he can’t shoot from behind the arc (shot 43% last season, but then you see he only attempted 65 threes before ending his season and he’s a 31.9% shooter over his career) and plays a similar aggresively-scoring game as budding star Eric Gordon even though he’s not nearly as good?

Maybe we should talk about the unfortunate burying of Al-Farouq Aminu on the cold, cold bench, where his only chance at joy will be a closer look at Vinny Del Negro’s hair. Or the way the Clippers, who were supposed to use their cap space to make trades for Chris Paul or Dwight Howard are now just 5 million away from the cap before re-signing DeAndre Jordan, and, assuming they extend Eric Gordon, will have to get creative to have room for a max free agent in 2012. Because, you know, when you think Clips, you think creative.

With Caron, though, it’s beyond the injury. He’s a solid defensive player, and is a natural small forward. With Aminu’s youth and Ryan Gomes’s Ryan Gomesiness, that’s something the Clippers need. But offensively, he’s a horrible fit. Butler’s go-to move is a continuous stream of immobile pump fakes and jab steps, hopefully lulling his defender into an advanced state of paralysis, enabling him to use what little lift he still has for a mid-range jumper.

In his defense, he’s not bad at making those shots – he made 43 %, 48 % and 45 % of his long twos over the past three seasons – but with his eroding athleticism seeing his free throw numbers cut in half since they peaked at 6 a night in 2008-2009. He’s a high-usage, middle-efficiency scorer, on a team that already has one of those (Chris Kaman), as well as two elite young everythings in Gordon and Blake Griffin, and a generally better offensive player in Mo Williams.

Why would you give a guy 8 million dollars a year to be the 5th option on offense if he’s shown an inability to play a 5th option style throughout his career? It’s classic Clippers, really. Faced with a promising situation, a single glaring hole and the means to fix it, they go sign the wrong player, for the wrong amount. And as Sterling is wont to do, they do it in a way that basically nullifies this entire (rather pointless) 5 month lockout that created this free agency frenzy in the first place. Because if a 34 year old Caron Butler will be getting 8 million a year, then the system is as broken as ever.

No options remain for us bystanders beyond enjoying the LOLs. Free agency madness continues, and once again, and the Clippers stand at the top of the heap of the freakishly confounding.

Weaver met with Blazers officials about replacing Rich Cho, who worked with Weaver under Oklahoma City Thunder GM Sam Presti.

via Blazers interview Weaver for GM job – NBA – Yahoo! Sports.

Blazers fans love to hate Paul Allen, and usually with good reason. We see him as the worst kind of overly meddlesome owner, one who has always been willing to spend to build a winner, but who can’t bring himself to just let his basketball guys do their jobs. He’s fired two extremely well-regarded GMs in the past two offseasons, and the general belief has been that Kevin Pritchard’s and Rich Cho’s main offenses have been not acting as yes-men for Allen. For Blazers fans, the losses first of Pritchard and then of Cho were tough to swallow, and Adrian Wojnarowski’s report last night of the team’s interest in Cho’s former Oklahoma City colleague Troy Weaver has prompted a round of here-we-go-agains. But perhaps we’re not giving Allen enough credit.

Maybe what we’re seeing here is Allen acting as something of a Robin Hood for small-market clubs. Those who argue against the need for increased parity always point to San Antonio and Oklahoma City as teams without the built-in advantages of, say, the Lakers, Knicks, or Celtics, who were able to build contenders through smart management and player development. And while not every team has close to those franchises’ level of front office, Allen is doing what he can to make it that way. Literally. His hiring of Cho from under Sam Presti a year ago was praised around the league, almost to the level that his ouster 10 months later was panned. But Cho landed on his feet, quickly taking the top job with the Charlotte Bobcats, the team he stole Gerald Wallace from during his stint in Portland. He immediately went to work in Charlotte, prying an extra top-10 pick from Sacramento on draft day. This drew plenty of eye-rolls from Blazers fans who wished he was still working on their behalf, but Bobcats fans had to feel like their team was in good hands. Which might have been Allen’s plan all along.

If the Blazers do, in fact, hire Weaver (which may come down to whether or not Weaver still has Cho’s phone number to ask questions about working for Allen), we could be seeing future of small-market basketball unfolding before our eyes:

1. Paul Allen snipes a highly-regarded executive from Portland’s toughest division rival, thereby weakening the Thunder and benefitting not only his team but also the Nuggets and Jazz.

2. This new GM pulls off a few one-sided deals in the vein of the Wallace trade, leaving the Blazers in better shape than when he started, and in the process building a reputation for himself as capable of running a team.

3. At the end of the season, the new guy is fired for some contrived reason having nothing to do with his talent or job performance.

4. He is promptly hired by another small-market club in need of a smart, level-headed GM. This move is praised by every NBA writer and executive, and boosts the confidence of that team’s fanbase. Now, one more small-market team is equipped with a talented and capable GM and is one step closer to competing.

5. Rinse and repeat.

Detroit, you’d do well to watch Portland next time there’s a season. This could be your future.

The universe we live in consists of a series of delicate balancing acts. For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Each natural cycle consists of millions of potential pitfalls, but still manage to reach their end (and naturally, their beginning) due to a very specific give and take between an infinite number of potential factors. And in the NBA, two franchises have won almost all the championships, but they…well I mean…you see…I’ve got nothing. Basketball does, at times, exist in a vacuum. There are haves and have-nots with little room for mobility in-between.

But on this very day, one of those have-nots has finally taken a step to right the ship. The absolutely invincible, untouchable, immortal Mike Dunleavy, Sr. has finally been relieved of his duties as the head of the Clippers. In all honesty, he probably doesn’t deserve it. The Clippers’ roster is a muddled mess of mismatched talent, missing a pretty pivotal piece, and yet they’ve been borderline world-beaters this year. When motivated and clicking, this team is tough to beat. They’re just not built in a way that’s cogent enough to deal with the daily grind. That’s the team that Dunleavy is coaching this year, and that’s the team that, for awhile there, looked to be a Blake Griffin return away from a playoff push. Now they’re sitting comfortably at 12th in the West, and aside from a truly surprising Grizzlies team (/cutaway to Moore dancing), are they really displaced in the conference hierarchy?

Hardly. But this is a lifetime achievement firing. Dunleavy the coach and Dunleavy the GM have kept the franchise’s head underwater in the lottery cesspool, though the former is hardly as responsible as the latter. But when you consider just how difficult it is to cut ties with a coach/GM with another year under contract (for $5.5 million, no less), this is a crucial first step. Call me petty and vengeful, but I have no qualms about Dunleavy being fired today for his sins of yesteryear, especially if it means we’re that much closer to punishing the real culprit here. It’s hard to uproot a combo coach/GM all at once, but in relieving Dunleavy from his coaching job, the Clippers are that much closer to redemption and hopefully, legitimacy.

People who wear black: Will Smith, certain Bob Dylans, the Devil (probably), bizarro Mark Twain, Darth Vader, Hot Topic staff, Johnny Cash, and, now, Richard Jefferson.

In one swift motion, the Spurs have turned three aging vets with expiring deals into a versatile, dynamic swingman that solves their problems on the wing.  This is why the trophy case in San Antonio is full, and this is why Tim Duncan goes to sleep every night with a smile on his face.

Going into this off-season, the Spurs’ priorities were easily defined: good health, adding scoring options, improving the depth in the frontcourt.  With the team’s wounded already on the fast track to recovery, the Spurs have traded into perhaps an unexpected bonus in regards to their overall health: Richard Jefferson, iron man.  In his eight year career, Jefferson has essentially had two season halted by injury.  That, in itself, isn’t noteworthy.  But the fact that Jefferson has averaged 80.5 games played per season over the rest of his career is worth a golf clap.  He’s been a night-in, night-out starter since his sophomore campaign in 2002-2003.  He’s averaged 35.8 minutes per game over his career.  Jefferson is built like a bull and apparently has the bone structure of one.  This, ladies and gentlemen, is about as sturdy as wing players get.  The Spurs seem to be in line for around 80 games of dynamic play on the wing, from a do-it-all small forward who fits seamlessly into the lineup.

It’s difficult to dispute the fact that Jefferson’s production doesn’t quite measure up to his pay grade (he’s due over $29 million the next two seasons).  The Spurs have essentially forfeited their claim in the 2010 bonanza for the chance to snag a wing player now, and it’s hard to argue with the results.  RJ’s price tag may not make sense for a lot of teams (including the Bucks), but it’s manageable for a veteran team looking to make a few off-season adjustments.  The Spurs have…come si dice…hit it big.

There are surely motivations for ditching Jefferson that don’t revolve around money.  A combination of his inability to produce on scale with his salary, an inflated sense of self-worth, poor choice in tattoos, and a bit of an attitude problem have led to Jefferson being labeled as something of a cancer.  Sulking, complaining, and macho posturing can tear apart a locker room from the inside, which is something the Nets and the Bucks looked to avoid by dealing our friend Richard.  I agree, to an extent, though I think of Jefferson as less of a cancer and more of a bad case of termites.  He’ll eat away at the foundation until he’s completely full of himself, done significant damage, or both, but hardly seems capable of anything fatal.  That said, while the team and management structures in New Jersey and Milwaukee aren’t in a position to deal with Jefferson’s ‘tude, San Antonio is damn well equipped for the job.  Reforming troublesome players is a bit of a Popovic hobby, and with the arsenal of veterans, coaches, and accolades at his disposal, the problem children rarely stand a chance.

With a new toy down in San Antone, I fully expect the Spurs to be in the top tier of the West next year.  Not only do they refuse to die, but they’re systematically replacing frail, old body parts with mechanized new ones.  With built in machine guns.

The Bucks, in return, get to save boatloads of money.  The figures seem to indicate a savings of around $21 million for the next two seasons, which is nothing to scoff at for a struggling team in a small market.  In theory, this would open up a giant cap space window for either the 2009 or 2010 free agent markets, but there are a few wrinkles:

• The Bucks still need to re-sign Charlie Villanueva and Ramon Sessions, or else include them in some kind of sign-and-trade.  Otherwise, they risk taking a huge step backward in the very near future.
• Before re-upping V-Nuv and Sessions (or Keith Bogans, Adrian Griffin, or Austin Croshere, should they choose to keep them around), Milwaukee is already on the books for $61.5 million in the coming season.  That’s well above the cap, and doesn’t yet include the Bucks’ first round pick in Thursday’s draft.  When all is said and done, this could very well be a team paying the luxury tax this season.
• While shedding Jefferson in favor of expiring deals saves ownership plenty of money in both straight up salary and what likely would have been luxury tax dollars, it doesn’t open up much cap room in 2010 either.  Including the 2009 draft pick on the second year of the rookie scale, the Bucks have $45 million in obligations…for just 7 players.  Again, this doesn’t include the salaries of Villanueva or Sessions.
• On top of all of the number-crunching, the Bucks still need to face the difficult fact that their city nor their team is a particularly attractive free agent destination.  If the plan is to continue trying to clear cap room by having a fire sale, there’s the harsh reality that no one will want to come play in Milwaukee.  Richard Jefferson’s outburst after the initial trade that sent him to the Bucks is not isolated; there are many players who would even turn down top-dollar deals for a chance to play in a brighter locale, both in terms of natural and team climate.  It’s not fair, but it needs to be acknowledged.

That’s why, penny-pinching aside (that’s a lot of pennies), I don’t see what’s in this deal for the Bucks.  The savings are indisputable, but the trade neither brings in new talent or even the avenues to pursue free agents.  Not quite the apocalypse for the Bucks, but this is in no way a good deal.

The Spurs made out like bandits, forcing Tim Duncan’s championship window ajar with exactly the type of player needed.  Jefferson’s scoring skills on from the wing will translate to all kinds of success for San Antonio, and his solid, athletic brand of defense should thrive in Pop’s system.  Spurs fans: be excited, be-be excited.  Everyone else: prepare to grumble, and sigh deeply.

For so long, Shaun Livingston has been the man who wasn’t there.  He existed, we knew that much.  He was somewhere, doing something basketbally.  Out of sight, somewhere in the very back of your mind whenever you evaluate your team’s miserable point guard rotation, as they say.

But this morning, the unexpected, illogical, and awesome occurred.  The Oklahoma City Thunder inked Livingston, whose D-League performances have been good, but hardly overwhelming, to a multiyear (probably unguaranteed) deal.  Yes.

The underlying sentiment of most Livingston stories will parade his rehabilitation, and rightfully so.  From that injury to what we can only hope is a full-time comeback, Shaun has come a long way.  At the core of this story is disappointment and redemption.  Strength, will, and resiliency.  But what Shaun represents isn’t a moral-of-the-story tagline or cheesy documentary featurette on the power of the human spirit.  Livingston, as much as any player, is hope.  Hope that a lanky, awkward 6’7” point guards can rule the league.  Hope that injured players can return to their previous form, even if that form was but a point on the slope to an undetermined end.  Hope that some players will realize that braids may not be for them, and that they look better with short hair.  Shaun Livingston, a prep star taken 4th in the NBA draft, is a remnant of an era that trumpeted potential, to the point that much of it was overestimated or assumed.  Maybe to some that mindset was the source of franchise failure, of one too many immature high schoolers or enigmatic Europeans. But take one of those ‘potential’ stars, and juxtapose them with the current Thunder.  Kevin Durant is already a star among stars, and among the best at his position in just his second season.  Russell Westbrook already seems destined for greatness, and combines high-flying sensationalism with a prowess for tackling the most beastly of beasts: defense at the point guard position.  Jeff Green is spectacular all on his own, versatile, determined, and just flat-out great at the game of basketball.  These guys have a combined five years of NBA experience, and are about as close to sure things as we get in the NBA this side of LeBron James.

The problem with players with elusive upside is that too many teams have put all their eggs in a basket that’s still being made; if Durant, Westbrook, and Green can provide a safety net, then won’t the structural integrity of both Livingston’s career and the Thunder’s prospects be the better for it?

This is essentially a no-pressure situation for Shaun.  All he has to do to earn a consistent spot in the rotation is be better than Earl Watson.  The team is young, and hardly faces a strict timeline.  Westbrook is already manning the starting point guard gig, relieving any pressure that Livingston would have to rush into a role that he just isn’t ready for.  He doesn’t have to take the lead, even if so many of his skills would typically lend themselves to just that.  All Shaun has to do is be the mysterious guy that sits in the corner, the one that no one quite knows what to make of, until he gathers himself, and puts together an outburst that none of us are likely to forget.  Or, y’know, just sit there.

Acquiring a hardly proven, injury-ridden point guard has never made so much sense.

I’ve been waiting for so long, and the day is finally here.  IT’S TIME TO ROCK MARDI GRAS STARBURY STYLE, Y’ALL.

Maybe Donnie Walsh watched “Me and Stephon” and found a soft spot in his heart for the guy, or maybe Marbury himself gave up a nice chunk of change in order to reach a buyout.  Either way, the dark cloud hanging above the association’s head has gone lickety split: Stephon Marbury will be playing NBA basketball this season, and the favorite for his services are none other than the Boston Celtics.  Delicious!

The Celtics are among the few teams with a strong enough culture and veteran presence to fully accommodate Marbury’s…specific needs.  He can be a weapon if you can control him, and Kevin Garnett might be just the guy to do it.

It’ll be interesting to see what happens with Marbury in the long-term, though.  Supposing he latches on with the Celtics and does a respectable job, what kind of contract would he deserve this summer?  The midlevel?  Less?  Every dollar that some EuroLeague owner has?  It’s a situation that’s entirely dependent on random, chaotic circumstances, and I’m not putting my money down on any particular outcome.  Matt called Rafer Alston a ‘wild card’ for the Magic, and to an extent he is, but is there a bigger question mark in this league than Stephon Marbury?  He could potentially score 20 points off the bench for you in a big game, or he could mire your team in an unvanquishable funk with his bizarre sense of self-righteousness.  Starbury’s been a one-man show in his own theater for a long time, but the intermission is over and it’s just getting to the good part.

Let’s focus on the here and now, shall we?  Until pen touches paper, I’m worried.  As a Mavs fan myself, a team with an owner who won’t hesitate to bust out his wallet and make a ballsy move if he deems it in the team’s best interest, I’m sweating just a tad.  The headlines and the stories read “Boston, Boston, Boston,” but I’ve recently seen a team actually willingly acquire Larry Hughes, a trade be untraded, Mikki Moore be described as a savior, and John Salmons and “blockbuster” in the same sentence.  Consider my horizons broadened and ready to accept any possibility.

So I, Rob Mahoney, formally extend the following invitation:

These are hard times for fans of any team but the Lakers or Cavs.  We have our own team worries to concern ourselves with, and wondering if Hot Potato Marbury is going to explode in our locker room isn’t something we should have to deal with.  It’s not that I wish ill will on Marbury.  I thought he deserved to be freed from New York, and the whole situation with him and the Knicks was a bit amateur hour.  I want him to join a team for the stretch run…just not my team.  Marbury’s getting plenty of mulah from the Knicks, meaning it’s possible that he could join up with any playoff squad for the minimum salary, even if they are over the cap.  So join me, bloggers, readers, and NBA fans of all kinds, in channeling our collective hopes towards the protection of our favorite teams!

One of the greatest things about following the NBA (or anything, for that matter) in detail is the absurdity and triviality of minutiae.  The other greatest thing about following the NBA is when people are actually fighting with each other over who gets to sign Mikki Moore.

Tom Ziller, Mikki Moore’s BFF, may have said it best:

Moore has an amazing story, with a one-in-a-million work ethic and a heart of solid gold. I’m a huge fan of Moore, The Man. So if a team like Boston wants to had him in order to help the youngsters stay motivated, to add 2.3 guttural screams per game, to boost the dreadlock/frightening tattoo quotient … by all means, do it. But don’t think Mikki will come in and be another P.J. Brown. That is not this dude.

Too true.  Mikki Moore, by all indications, sounds like an incredible man.  But as we all know, men don’t play basketball.  Playas do.  Ya dig?  I remember a day when it was cool to make fun of the fact that Mikki Moore could only make dunks.  I remember a day when Mikki Moore vowed to become Jason Kidd’s bodyguard for life because he made him millions of dollars.  And I foresee a day when we, brothers and sisters of the basketball world, join hands in giggling whenever Moore’s name is mentioned as a vital cog of the Celtic bench.

Great in the locker room, great in the psyches of younger players, and not so great in the paint.  This, ladies and gentlemen, is Mikki Moore, savior of the Boston Celtics.

Buzz-kill alert: the Chandler-to-OKC trade is no more.  And let me be the first to tell you, this is some pretty bad news for all parties involved.

As of yesterday, one team was in mourning and another finding legitimacy.  The tragic fall of the Hornets was countered by the impending meteoric rise of the Thunder, who reinforced one of their weakest positions by adding one of the game’s best interior defenders.  It all made sense for the Thunder, who used smart management and unadulterated opportunism to swipe away a young center who was a perfect fit for the team they hope to build.

That’s all changed.  Where one team fell and another rose from the ashes, both teams now stand in their own relative states of sorrow.  Oklahoma City ponders what could have been, a day’s worth of excitement and intrigue turned into nothing but a fantasy.  New Orleans is now left wondering (or the more likely: worried that the cat’s out of the bag) what defect in Chandler’s physique would be worrisome enough for the Thunder to turn down a high quality big man (that better be one helluva toe injury).

Oh, and I’m sure it won’t be awkward for anyone.

A trade that at least produced one happy party has been rescinded, and all of the happiness in the room went with it.  Any joy that goes along with Tyson’s return has been sapped by the elephant in the room, and it’s tough to say just how much his physical status could impact the Hornets’ outlook.  Maybe OKC is just enjoying the luxury of time for a team with low expectations.  Or maybe there is something legitimately problematic with Chandler’s wheel.  It does make for quite the leverage-killer though; Chandler’s curious injury status practically ensures his place in NOLA, barring some ridiculous, unspeakably lopsided trade.  That likely means that the Hornets will be active until the final bell tolls on the trade deadline this afternoon, trying desperately to clear enough salary to duck under the luxury tax line.

So, let’s all go back to our everyday lives.  It was fun while it lasted, but all good things must come to an end.  Wipe those eyes, Thunderites, and prepare to be kept up at night wondering if Tyson stubbed his pinkie toe on the curb, Hornetians.  There’s still plenty of time until the trade deadline, and I’m doubtful we’ve heard the last from either of these franchises.

Welcome to Mihmphis, y’all.

One year ago, the Memphis Grizzlies sent Pau Gasol to the Lakers for questionable returns and under questionable circumstances.  It transformed L.A. from hopefuls to contenders, with seemingly no basketball benefit for the Grizz.

Then, last night, the Lakers agreed to send Chris Mihm* to the Grizzlies in a Camby-esque salary dump.  Chris Mihm for a future conditional second round pick?  Hello Lakers?  It’s common sense calling.  You just made a HUGE mistake…or did they?  It all seems a bit suspicious.  Could it be that the real prize of the Gasol trade was not Marc Gasol’s rights or the mythical creature known as cap space, but actually a highly conditional side trade which would ultimately steal away the Mihmster?  The Mihmdog?  Mihmastopholes?

I’m on to you, Chris Wallace.

*Chris Mihm is terrible at basketball.